Relationshit realization

Rants and Raves, Relationships

You know that moment when everything seems like it’s going great, and then the girl stalks your Facebook, then overthinks and overreacts by jumping ship because she’s got feelings? Or dating someone who jumps into a relationship without being ready and without thinking about it?  Yea. I know that feeling too. Though I digress.

So all this comes from a girl I just dated for a short time. We hit it off immediattely. A lot in common, great conversations, great sex, we had a lot of fun together. We spent almost a full 2.5 weeks together. Then the problem weekend arrived. I get a text on Friday saying we should take it slow. Then Sunday I get a text saying we should just be friends. Now without going into every little detail, she wanted more romance/courting and more little nice gestures. Which personally I see as skewed and ignorant to an extent. For a few reasons. Everyone has a different idea of romance and courting for one. And I can’t fucking read minds. It was also never discussed. The other thing that’s retarded about that. She had her kid every evening M-F, so the main times we could do anything were weekends. First and Second weekend we had dates. Third weekend, I had plans from months ago and I even invited her. Sure, she brought me over food 2 times, and took me to a baseball game (which btw, I hate baseball. My nice gesture was going with, point and case, some people don’t realize a nice gesture). I brought her food once, bought her tickets on the second date, bought her food a couple times and invited her to go to theater in the near future. In either case, it becomes too much of a comparison and too much of an expectation. I’ll give you the world, being my time and my priority. My personality isn’t to give you random THINGS. It’s to give you my love. Funny thing about it too, she would complain about having shitty friends who just get drunk, act immature and don’t commit. Then has the balls to say she doesn’t feel special and just feels like friends when I am the one to give priority and a positive influence.

OMG. He’s got aspects of an ex, I’ve gotta run away. OMG. I have feelings. RUN! I need to focus on myself. I need to focus on my daughter. You don’t give me xyz. All bullshit. All excuses. If you like being around someone for any reason, be around them. Oh, and as long as I’m on that subject of ranting. Guy friends. You’re naive if you think they aren’t just keeping you around as an option. MOST guys will keep hot girls around as options. So if you’re a good looking girl who’s got a lot of guy friends. Don’t expect any guy worthwhile to be comfortable with that. While we may be confident with ourselves and you, we know guys.

Bottom line. If you like someone, don’t run away. SIT DOWN and DISCUSS expectations. Most good guys aren’t gonna become your friend right away after a relationship. It’s going to take healing time.

My outlook on dating

Rants and Raves, Relationships

Dating these days is complicated, stressful and impossible to understand. I’m always wondering, should I say this, should I text that, should I call, am I being needy. I mean fuck, you can’t be yourself anymore without scaring them away.

Personally, if I like you right off the bat and enjoy being around you, I’d rather date you and only you until we determine it’s going to work out or not. Dating more than one person at a time doesn’t make sense to me It’s harder to keep track of who the person you like really is, makes it harder to remember things they’ve told you, etc.

I can’t stand how it’s so impossible to tell the outcome. It’s all like a foreign language. If he/she says you’re sweet, but he/she’s still thinking about it, then what the fuck?

Some of this I blame on the guys who use girls for sex.  The idea of playing with emotions isn’t appealing because I know the feeling all too well. Downside of falling fast, and being somewhat OCD.

People always tell me to “focus on yourself”, “do what makes you happy”. Well what if I told you I was happy before starting to date someone, the fact that I get down from wondering where it’s going to go is situational and is typically an emotional response that is engrained in some of us, if not all of us.

In any case. I’m going to be myself. Love it or hate it. I’m genuine.

Nicole Arbour said it even better. Dating these days is Fucked.